Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Personal Independence Far Away
It is always easier for a group of people to declare to be independent than an individual does.
Basically, the independence of a group of people means these people can govern themselves, which means they have more rights. People divide themselves into smaller groups if they can gain more benefits through it, just as the United States did. It mostly bases on a rational and economic thought.
For individuals, it's totally different. What is the definition of personal independence then? To live alone and be self-sufficient like Robinson Crusoe
on an isolated island? If this is the truth, then sentences at the end of the movie Breakfast at Tiffany's won't be that impressive--Paul Varjak: "You know what's wrong with you, Miss Whoever-You-Are? You're chicken, you've got no guts. You're afraid to stick out your chin and say, 'Okay, life's a fact, people do fall in love, people do belong to each other, because that's the only chance anybody's got for real happiness.' You call yourself a free spirit, a wild thing, and you're terrified somebody's going to stick you in a cage. Well, baby, you're already in that cage. You built it yourself. And it's not bounded in the west by Tulip, Texas, or in the east by Somaliland. It's wherever you go. Because no matter where you run, you just end up running into yourself. " If people "belong" to each other, then how can we be so sure and proud to announce that we are independent?
To be independent and self-outstanding is trendy and exactly what's on fashion. We can never find a smile on a supermodel on T-stage. Their eyes tells nothing but " I don't give it a damn." Here I'm not criticizing fashion industry alone. There is always a reason behind every fashion element. Here the reason is that after being constrained by many factors for too long time, people all over the world are seeking "independence" crazily and it is popular to stay as "cool" as a cucumber. Independence here means that one needs to be so rich to be self-sufficient and stay indifferent to those who may interrupt that status. First, people seek wealth, which doesn't need much tenderness from others. After becoming wealthy, people keep their eyes close to others because they don't need others to help them live a comfortable life any more.
But material life is not the whole. In Haruki Murakami's novel Noweign Wood, main characters just committ suicide one after another without an omen. In the time when the story happens in the novel, economy booms and it's uncommon for people to give up their lives because everyone has something to be busy with--looking for chances to earn more moony. Those who commit suicide find the mainstream of view of the value of life meaningless but feel helpless to find their own way to live a satisfying life, a life with warmth and care and mental pursuit. In Haruki's novel, characters seem to be fragile because they are "sensitive in an insensitive world." They feed on love and tenderness from each other.
I agree with Haruki that love and care, like bread, is a must for individual. People do belong to each other. And this is the right way to stay mental health. If independece just means that one can live well alone, it is really hard for individual to keep absolute independence. People's mind is always deep and difficult which is even impossible to calculate.
So now I'm not sure weather I am an independent person, because I can't live without all my friends.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Dear Winnie,
ReplyDeleteThis is such a great response to the discussion question. You have raised some truly compelling questions that are engaging and not easily answered, which I feel is one of the marks of a good critical thinker.
I especially liked and identified with what you said regarding the fashion industry and how it is considered "in" to be independent to the point where nothing fazes you and no one can affect you. While I personally think it is wise to feel this way to some extent, I also believe that reaching a balance is ideal, because, as humans, it is virtually impossible to be totally independent. We cannot be completely closed off to the rest of humankind and the world. As such, while it is a desirable characteristic to remain
unaffected by the negativity of others, we must remain open to people and, in the process, risk getting hurt. (Of course, reaching this ideal balance of not-caring/caring is a continual, and not always forward-moving, process, and is much easier said than done.)
I think you really hit the nail on the head when you commented about how trendy it is to be independent and individualistic. Yet when everyone is encouraged to be so, no one truly is either independent or individualistic. Even Apple
products exhibit this contradiction, as all the company's products have an "i" in front of them, denoting our individuality, yet because seemingly everyone owns an Apple product (myself included), thanks, in part, to their excellent mass marketing appeal, ownership of an Apple product is not an emblem of our proud individuality, but rather the opposite -- our attempts to be socially recognized as the norm and a part of the in-crowd.
Many other cultures consider Americans to be too independent and, consequently, emotionally distant or closed off. Indeed, there are dangers associated with being too independent, which your response does well to remind us. Thank you for such a thoughtful answer. I will have to read that Murakami novel for myself, as I think it sounds really interesting and prevalent considering our times.
Sincerely,
Mitali
Wei Qiang,
ReplyDeleteI was quite surprised by your post. I thought: "So, there is someone who see independence as bound to love and care?"
It is an interesting way of considering it. However, it seems a bit unrealistic, candid vision. World is not only composed by loving and caring people. Otherwise, why all the wars or diplomatic agreements for a country to be acknowledged as independent?
If you think I am being to harsh, please have a look at this link: http://bit.ly/OicmBe.
You might reply this: "Well, maybe this is true for countries. Nevertheless, I was talking about people, so the situation is different."
How is the situation different? Life certainly is about enjoying, yet, one can't go through it without fighting for it. You fight for your studies, to feed yourself, to afford your pleasures, pay your taxes, and so on.
It is said that we "become independent" or that we "gain independence", implying that there is path - an infinite variety of paths - to reach that status. It does not mean that one has to fight against someone else; I just see it as fighting, standing up for yourself.
To conclude, I would like to say that Holly Golightly is definitely not independent.
I never understood why people love so much Audrey Hepburn's image in this movie, brand it, decline it in so many forms, without realizing what is the real story behind it. Most of them just think of Tiffany's, Hepburn and the glamour.
Whereas in reality, Holly is completely lost: she is eager for the money to help her brother, to the point she would give into a marriage for money. She did not choose not to marry José, it is just the unfortunate consequence of mixing with "the wrong people". Fortunately, she is helped by Paul. His actions are crutches to her, but what would happen if at some point, he didn't love her anymore? No crutch, no safety, all alone in the rain and the cat gone?
Is this the only outcome of the sank away love and attention? Where is the independence in that?
Do not misunderstand me: I believe in love, in attentiveness. I just consider that associating them with independence is a sweet utopia.
Hi, Serena~ If I didn't misunderstand you, you are saying that people should have courage and independent ability to deal with problems in real life instead of expecting love or care to be the solution. Actually I really agree with that. What I want to express is that with ability we cans survive well but not live well. Love and care is mental pursuit beside the necessary material self-support independence. Reality or material life is like bones while love and care are like fine complexion. When people already have the ability to feed themselves well, they are going to seek true beauty inside the humanity. We should first be intelligent, or wise enough to deal with real life problems, and then we can enjoy ourselves in mental world freely, which is my ideal status.
DeleteMaybe I am still too young to fully understand the cruel society because of limited experience, but I am glad to read your long response. Inspirations always come from collision right? Thank you for your opposite point of view and I really need that. I will pay more attention to what you said.
literally, I really like your article. It's so well organized, logically reasonable and pursuasive. I'm also touched by the capital in breakfast at Tiffany's. The words there gives you the answer. Freedom soul doesn't mean you cannot love and belong to someone and the one who loves you must know respecting your own choice and idea is crucial and see you as an independent person. To be simple, our parents hope us to grow up to be independent but they still love us. Their back-up will make us strong to face any difficulties.
ReplyDelete